Does the title count? – #writing 101


“There. It’s done. One hundred word flash fiction” I said.

“Err … actually … it’s a hundred and four” he said, the smile spreading across his face. “Count them. A hundred and four.”

“No, there were ninety-eight until I added the two ‘buts’ and that made one hundred, exactly.” It was my turn to smile.

“You forgot the title” he said. “That’s the extra four.”

“You can’t count the title” I shouted. “It’s not part of the text.”

“It’s still part of the story” he smirked. “So it counts.”

“Bloody challenge” I said. “I hate this stuff. Hate it all.”

Writing and Not Writing – #writing101


What do you do when you’re not writing? How do you reset and return to this dashboard, refreshed? What do you need in your day-to-day life to maintain balance: Running? Yoga? Gardening? Painting? Cooking?

Well I basically get on with life. Writing is something I do to fill a gap in the day, but it’s not at the top of day-to-day list. The small amount of writing I do is just a hobby. One of a number that do. I’m not such an accomplished writer that it can be anything else but a hobby. One of the reasons for my joining this challenge, was to improve my writing, and I think it is beginning to work.

But I enjoy …….

  • Reading (fiction and non)
  • Walking
  • Social media
  • Listening to music
  • Cooking and eating

Then the more unusual ……

  • Knitting
  • Ironing (clothes)

The rest of the time is spent working, sleeping and coping with life in general.

Update your readers over a cup of coffee – #writing 101


Hmmm, I thought when I saw this. It’s not something I would normally do. Then I decided to ‘think outside the box’ as the saying goes. So this is my imaginary video conversation with an imaginary friend.

“Well hello there. Finally got this video call thing working. Thanks for the help.”

“No, no I was really struggling. I thought I was going to have to get an Apple. I never thought you would have Skype what with FaceTime and that.”

“So how’s the coffee?”

“You’re having tea? I didn’t think you Americans drank tea!”

“Ah. Of course. I had forgotten you were at Uni here.”

“Me. Yeah coffee is good. I bought a new machine last week. I just need to learn how to make anything but espresso.”

“Noooo. I love espresso, but I can’t drink more than two a day”

”I was just going to ask you that.”

“Well a couple of things since the last time I emailed. I’ve been doing more on my blog.”

“I’ve had it a couple of years now. It’s just starting to take off.”

“It’s a WordPress one.”

“Yeah, I tried Blogger but it was bit of a pain to set up.”

“Err … it’s not really about anything in particular. It’s just what I think at the time.”

“Like I say, it’s just beginning to take off properly now.”

“I’m  following a couple of challenges.”

“Yeah, you get a prompt or something like that and you post something that relates to it.”

“I suppose it does do away with the spontaneity, but it has increased my readership and it does kind of force me to do something.”

“So, how’s the family ………….”

This is the point when I thought I had gone on long enough.

Reinvent the letter format – #writing 101


Dear Knees,

I appreciate that you may be feeling a little left out at the moment and I know you’re missing the cod liver oil capsules. However I feel that you may not be aware of the reasons for my discontinuation of that Omega 3 supplement that you so cherish.

I am unsure if Brain actually mentioned this, but in June of last year Heart went through a bit of a traumatic experience. Brain did assure me that the correct signals had been issued, but he is getting on a bit, and may have missed you off the list.

To cut a short story even shorter, Heart had a procedure undertaken in a medical establishment. This procedure meant that Heart had one of his valves (I understand it was a Mitral valve) being replaced or repaired. I am reliably advised that you would have been informed at some point. At the end of the day, the procedure and resulting medications mean that the Omega 3 supplement (that you know as Cod Liver Oil) has had to be withdrawn. Now, I am not aware of the full reason for this, but Mouth says (and this is in Mouths words) that “… it buggers up your INR and messes with the Warfarin …” Eyes had Googled this and it seems that the information is accurate as far as Wikipedia is concerned.

So that is it in a nutshell. In order that Heart keeps up its proscribed function, it needs this Warfarin stuff. For that to work properly, the Omega 3 supplement has to be forgone. I can understand your reluctance to accept this, but I hope you realise that without Heart, your position as Knees are untenable.

Yours sincerely

Body

Hook ’em with a quote – #writing101


“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
Oscar Wilde

“Well,” she asked. “Did you get it?”

She knew the answer before he spoke. “Of course you didn’t. How could you? Dressed like that!”

“Like what? What’s wrong with the way I’m dressed?” he said as he looked down at his feet.

“Cheap. That’s what’s wrong with the way you dress. Cheap and nasty,” she said.

“But this is how I always dress,” he answered. “It’s not cheap. This suit cost nearly a hundred pounds.”

“Like I said … cheap. Tesco’s finest. Off the peg. You’re never going to impress anyone like that,” she said. “These people know that kind of thing.”

She turned away and walked toward the window. She was angry. Angry with him. Angry with herself for letting him be like that. She had told him that the job was important. She hadn’t told him why it was so important. Why that extra £4,000.00 a year raise was important. Then there was the annual bonus … and the car. God how important would a car be now.

“It was just a job,” he said. “I’m not sure I really wanted it in the first place.”

You wanted…” she said. “Not sure that ‘you’ wanted it.” She turned, “Have not even considered what I wanted? What I needed. What ‘we’ needed.”

She walked back to the coffee table and picked up her wine glass.

“Do you know who got it?” she said.

“Daniel,” he replied. “Daniel Lofthouse ….”

“I know who ‘Daniel’ is,” she snapped. “I know his wife. She’ll not let me forget this. It’ll be all over the golf club by the morning.”

“Like I said. It’s only a job. Daniel was always going to be favourite to get it. I didn’t stand a chance really.” He swilled the whisky round in his glass, then drank it down in one.

“God,” she cried, “you simply don’t get it do you? Daniel got the job because of who he is. What he is. How he acts. What he says. What he does. He got the job, because he is Daniel.”

She walked right up to him and looked him straight in the eye.

“Why can’t you be more like him?” she screamed at him.

He turned, and walked to the door. “Because …… because …… I’m not Daniel. I’m me.”